Popular Nigerian counsellor, life coach and pastor Christie Bature has sparked conversation online after warning young women about the dangers of rushing into marriage before discovering who they are.

Speaking during a podcast appearance, Pastor Bature said she is never excited when young women in their early twenties come to her with plans to get married, arguing that most of them have not yet developed the self-awareness that a successful marriage demands.

"When girls come to me aged 23, 22, 21, getting married, I don't get excited. You don't even know what you want yet," she said.

The counsellor backed her position with neuroscience, pointing out that the human brain continues developing well into a person's mid-twenties.

"The human brain is not fully developed till 26. Some of the stupid decisions our children take,  it's not because they want to be stupid, it is that the brain is not fully developed. Girls married at 18, 19, 20 they don't even know they are growing into themselves. They come into this and suddenly realise that the person they married doesn't have the capacity for that," she said.

Pastor Bature used the moment to challenge women who allow themselves to be defined by domesticity before marriage, warning that this creates a breeding ground for conflict later.

"What did he meet you doing? This is part of the problem. You were just sitting down in your father's house. They were paying all your bills. He met a pampered woman just sitting down. Now as far as he's concerned, you are a woman that is content to sit at home. Now you wake up and say no, you are international relations. It's going to cause friction. Get into the business of who God called you to be before you marry," she said.

ID