Pastor Bisi Adewale has argued that a man’s primary duty in marriage is to provide spiritual leadership for his family, not financial support or emotional affection.

The message was shared in a widely circulated social media video.

In the clip, Adewale said many men prioritise providing for their households and expressing love to their wives, while overlooking their relationship with God.

He explained that a husband’s first responsibility is to serve as the priest of the home.

According to him, spiritual leadership should take precedence over every other marital duty.

“All men in the house, please listen to this. The first duty of a man in marriage is not to provide. The first duty of a man in marriage is not to love his wife. The first duty of a man in marriage is to be a priest of the family,” he said.

Adewale cautioned that love not rooted in faith can become selfish and harm the marriage.

He noted that without a connection to God, a man may lack the understanding to love his wife properly, which can lead to unreasonable demands and emotional pain.

He urged men and prospective husbands to focus on building their relationship with God first.

“If you love your wife without loving God, very soon you will be wicked to that woman because you won’t even know how to love her. Because your love will be selfish love, demanding love. Very soon you are going to hurt her deeply,” he added.

He referenced the biblical instruction to seek the kingdom of God and his righteousness, adding that other aspects of life, including marriage, are benefits that follow.

“Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and every other thing shall be added,” he said.

Adewale described marriage as one of the additions that come from a God-centred life: “Marriage is other things added.”

He maintained that provision and affection are important but remain secondary to spiritual headship.